How do you live your life with HPV? And how do you tell someone you love?

by Rachel on May 6, 2011

How do live normally? 20 years old, no health care, and a horrible disease. New boyfriend, almost love worthy, and I don’t know if I can tell him. I don’t want him gone… What do I do?

{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

Kai W May 6, 2011 at 10:11 am

What kind of HPV do you have?

JusTmE May 6, 2011 at 10:25 am

Awww, sweetheart, I promise you that life does go on…very normally. Once you take care of HPV, your symptoms typically stay gone b/c your immune system will fight it off. You will still have it, but you won’t have to deal with symptoms. Plus, you would be very surprised how many people have HPV. Like 80%….just most of them don’t know they have it. If your boyfriend has had sex before he has more than likely already been exposed to the virus. Most people just don’t show symptoms.

If you have high-risk HPV (abnormal cells on cervix), it will make telling him MUCH easier. Men carry this type of HPV but there are no side effects since this type of HPV is only on the cervix.

If you have low-risk HPV (warts), you just need to be honest and straight forward. Be sure to tell him all the facts and the statistics- most people have been exposed but their immune system fights it off. He may already be carrying the virus but not showing any visible signs. If he loves you, HPV is nothing to leave you over. If he does walk away, he wasn’t worth all the worry. If he stays, you know you have an amazing boyfriend who truly loves you. I understand you don’t want him gone, but the only thing you can do is be honest and give him the facts. The rest is up to him. I promise you…if he walks away there will be a guy to come along who accepts everything about you and loves you unconditionally 100%.

While it is a sucky disease…the good thing is that it is totally manageable. Plus, once you take care of the symptoms (abnormal cells or warts) it typically STAYS gone. Find a good doctor and ask him all the questions you can so that you feel comfortable with what is going on and so that you can explain all the details to your boyfriend.

In this situation, you just have to do what is necessary. Take care of it promptly, keep track of doc appts, tell your boyfriend when you feel comfortable, and don’t worry too much. Take it seriously but don’t worry so much that it puts a damper on your life. Life goes on and you just have to take it in stride, step by step and adjust to this new stepping stone in your life.

If it makes you feel better, I have a very similar story to yours. I was 22 when I found out I have both high risk and low risk, I had no insurance, and I had no idea what I was getting into. Four years later…I’m okay, life is normal, I get regular checkups, and it wasn’t fun but I got through it. I’m still scared to tell a future boyfriend, but its just something that has to be done. How he deals with it is up to him and will show his true character.

I’m sorry I like wrote you a book on here, but I remember so well what you are feeling and how scared I was. I thought the world ended, when in reality it was just a road bump.

Take a deep breath…you’ll be just fine. :) If you need someone to talk to you, you can definitely email me.

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